The Worst Day & The Best Day

This is a little long-winded, but please bear with me.  The ending is wonderful!

So Friday was really emotional.  Grammie passed away.  I was thinking about being strong and not breaking down at work.  (You know how awkward it is when people you kinda know come up and ask if you're ok?  No, I'm not ok, my Grammie just died and I don't want to be here anymore.)

I was thinking about all of my training classes I have scheduled next week and who will teach them when I am gone.  I was thinking about how much I hate funerals.  I was thinking about how much I love the 23rd Psalm, but would I feel differently about it once I read it at Grammie's funeral?  All of these thoughts and emotions were flooding my mind.  I was thinking about all of the things I had to take care of.  Who would take care of me?

I busted up a meeting my boss was having (really I just knocked on the door, but it still felt rude) and told her what had happened.  I had been keeping my boss up to date on what was happening with Grammie and that she may be passing sometime soon.  She told me to go home early, be with my family, and not to worry about a thing.  I felt so blessed to be with a company who cares about people and takes care of their own.  I really felt taken care of.

So, while driving home, I call my in-laws (oh, they are so wonderful) and they agreed to keep Claire Friday night so that I could go to the movies with Luke and Bella rather than be stuck at home with the baby.  I just didn't want to be a home.  I didn't want to be alone.  I wasn't sure what the night had in store but, my in-laws took care of me, like they always do.

I arrive home and took a shower.  It just felt like the right thing to do.  To wash away all of those tears, or at least to stand in the shower and cry where it didn't matter because my face was already soaking wet.  But it did make me feel better.  I watched a few minutes of last week's episode of The Bachelorette (it's a guilty pleasure of mine although this season is a bit disappointing), folded a load of clean clothes and got dressed.

Luke called and said Bella's friend couldn't join us at the movies so we would meet at McDonald's, grab a bite to eat and all go to the movies together.  When we arrived at the Golden Arches, Bella asked me if we could go next door to LifeWay and get her a new Bible. 

Of course, was my first thought.  New Bibles are amazing!  Feeling the crisp pages, waiting to be christened with notes and late nights with flashlights under the covers because the story is just that good.  New Bible it is.  Let's throw down these chicken nuggets, set the correct time on Bella's new Shrek watch from her Happy Mean, and head next door to LifeWay and get this girl a Bible.

And then Bella says, "Well Momma Gigi.  Don't you want to know why I want a new Bible?"  And I reply, "Because the Bible you have has little lambs on it and it's really for babies."  And with her sweet smile she says "Nope."  "Well then, why?" I asked.  And then she gets real shy and tells Luke that he needs to tell me.  Ok, the suspense is killing me.  Did Claire color in her Bible?  Did she lose it?  What?

And Luke utters the best words I could ever imagine.  "Momma Gigi, Bella asked Jesus to come into her heart because she wants to live with Him and be a Christian!"  I started to cry.  My sweet girl had been saved.  She got real uncomfortable, but I reassured her that these were the happiest of tears.

Because every night I pray.  Not for a pay raise or a bigger house.  I have full faith that He will take care of us.  I pray nightly that Luke and I will raise Godly children.  That they will know the Lord and His great love.  For my oldest, this prayer had just been answered.

Luke later explained to me how this had come about.  He was telling her that I may be sad because my Grammie had died and gone to Heaven.  She wanted to know more about Heaven and why Jesus came to Earth.  And her questions just kept coming, so Luke sat with her for about half an hour and answered them.  He told her that Grammie went to Heaven because she was a Christian, and that only Christians go to Heaven. 

To make a long story short, she asked her Daddy how she could become a Christian so that she would go to Heaven too.  And so, in the middle of a parking lot, he led her in a prayer to ask Jesus to come into her heart.  My worst day had just become my best day. 

I can't tell you the joy I feel right now, knowing that Bella had found the Lord.  I'm almost crying as I write this.  And I know Grammie would be elated that her death had brought one of her great-grandchildren to salvation.

We may be sparse on posts this week as Claire and I travel to Huntsville for the services.  And then next week, Bella will be with her mom and I will be travelling for work in North Dakota, so probably not much time to write then either. 

But I cannot express how deeply appreciative I am for all of your thoughts and prayers.  They mean the world to me.  You are not strangers whom I have never met that live in far away cities, you are now my friends, and I am so thankful for the support you have provided my family and I.  Really, you will never know the depths of my gratitude.

And as my friend Alysha so perfectly quoted, "Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted." Matthew 5:4